


The Two-Person Pride Parade

by alleyesonthehindenburg



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Allusions to period-typical homophobia, LGBTQ Jewish Character(s), LGBTQ Themes, Multi, not-quite-a-fic fic, pride month, we have come a long way since the late '90s/early '00s
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-09
Updated: 2017-06-09
Packaged: 2018-11-12 02:10:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11152008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alleyesonthehindenburg/pseuds/alleyesonthehindenburg
Summary: They knew working at the White House was never going to be easy, but neither of them expected how it would feel like such a kick in the teeth sometimes. After Lowell Lydell is beaten to death, CJ finds Josh at her doorstep with a six pack of beer. They have to run out for more before the night is up, but it helps, and it becomes something of a tradition.(or, in honour of Pride Month, the West Wing fic I’m too lazy to properly write)





	The Two-Person Pride Parade

**Author's Note:**

> This sort of sprang up because I was supposed to be writing an essay but who even does that??? Anyway. This isn't really a fic, more like a really long synopsis of a fic I'm too lazy to actually write.

From the minute Toby brings CJ onto the campaign, she and Josh are dancing around each other.

There’s just something sitting at the back of her mind. It’s not until she overhears Josh talking to his assistant Donna that she recognises it – it’s the same thing that drew her to Joanna Leed in ninth grade, the best friend who became the girlfriend; it’s the same thing that led her to a group of nerds at UC Berkeley, the nerds who became the first community she ever knew. She figures it out because Josh is talking about a date, and he never uses a single pronoun. She figures it out because she’s been doing it since she was sixteen.

At some point, gay rights come up in Governor Bartlet’s debate prep, and there’s a split second where she catches Josh’s eye. They exchange a look, and it’s all they need. CJ knows that, for however long this lasts, he’s the only person who can know, and the only person who needs to know.

* * *

 They don’t actually speak about it until Governor Bartlet has become President-Elect Bartlet. It's ten to midnight, the first of what CJ assumes will be many, many late nights in the West Wing. They've been unpacking their offices all day, and CJ has invited the four younger members of the senior staff - herself, Josh, Toby and Sam - for a beer on her brand new couch. Toby's wrapping something up with Leo, and Sam's been sent to get the booze, which leaves CJ and Josh alone.

"So, we're in the White House," Josh says. It's still early days; that sense of awe hasn't worn itself out yet. CJ's not sure it ever will.

"We're in the White House," she agrees. "Holy shit. We're in the White House."

That sends them into a fit of slightly hysterical laughter, and CJ thinks vaguely that she should try to get more than four hours of sleep tonight.

Eventually Josh sobers, and CJ can tell by the pensive look on his face just what he's thinking about. "So, if the press catches wind of, you know, me…"

"Just don't let them," she says firmly, like it's that simple.

"Uh-huh." He nods, and looks down at his hands. "We've really given up any chance at a private life here, haven't we?"

"We all have."

"Yeah, but."

She sighs, and leans back against the couch, closing her eyes. Lets herself think about it for the first time. No community clubs or bars, that's for sure. No public dates, or at least not ones that look like dates. No plus ones at galas or weddings or speeches. "Yeah, Josh. We've really given it up."

He's quiet for long enough that she opens her eyes to check if he's fallen asleep. After a minute he turns to face her head on, and says, "CJ, I'm bisexual, and you're probably the only person I'll tell that to for the duration of this administration."

She sits up, because now that he's said it, she realises this might be the last time she can speak the word for a long time. "Josh, I'm a lesbian."

They shake hands, because it feels like the right thing to do, and Josh smiles. "I think we've just started a two-person pride parade."

CJ laughs, and Sam arrives with the beer.

* * *

 They knew working at the White House was never going to be easy, but neither of them expected how it would feel like such a kick in the teeth sometimes. After Lowell Lydell is beaten to death, CJ finds Josh at her doorstep with a six pack of beer. They have to run out for more before the night is up, but it helps, and it becomes something of a tradition.

* * *

 They're at the hospital, waiting for news on Josh, when CJ meets Cristina Feltsman.

Cristina is a nurse who usually works the daytime shift; she volunteered to come in when she heard the president was shot. CJ spends a whole forty-five minutes talking to her, and she doesn't even realise it until Toby comes looking for her. Six days later, CJ's visiting Josh when the on-duty nurse comes in to check his vitals. They talk, Cristina scribbles out her number on the unused napkin from Josh's lunch. Josh spends the rest of CJ's visit grinning and waggling his eyebrows at her.

Dating is a goddamn ordeal. First CJ has to work up the nerve to actually call, then she has to flirt (Josh is in the room for one of those calls and she kicks him out because he's howling with laughter), then she sets up the date - dinner at her place, followed by a movie in a suitably darkened theatre. The first date goes well. So does the second, and at the end of the third, CJ decides it's time to have The Talk.

The Talk is really, really not fun. Explaining that she can't be out, and she probably can't even be seen hanging around someone who's out, just in case. She can't go to gay clubs, or gay bars, or gay anything. The job has to come first, the president has to come first, and I know this sounds shitty but do you still want to date me?

And somehow, miraculously, Cristina says yes.

* * *

 Josh doesn’t consider himself very observant. He goes to the synagogue on the high holidays, and he goes to appease his mother whenever she’s visiting, but for the most part he’s not very religious.

But when your entire world is collapsing around you because it turns out the president may have committed a massive fraud against the American public and has drawn you into what’s basically a coverup, well. Josh stops by Toby’s office on Friday night, and the next morning he finds himself sitting in a synagogue.

It’s only after the service that the man who was sitting to his left introduces himself. Anthony Cohen, it turns out, is an adjunct professor of political science at Georgetown University, and he asks if there are any updates on the president’s secret plan to fight inflation.

For the first time since that whole gaffe happened, Josh finds the question funny instead of annoying.

Still, he’s mindful of Toby nearby, so he keeps it professional. _Too_ professional, actually, because for a second it looks like Anthony’s going to end the conversation, and Josh panics and asks him to get a coffee some time. “To talk about, you know, political science,” he clarifies.

Political science turns into economics turns into the neighbourhoods they grew up in turns into anything and everything. Josh kind of gets now why CJ never shuts up about Cristina.

* * *

 They’re in the Oval Office when it falls apart.

_Everyone_ is in the Oval Office, in fact – Leo, Toby, Sam, even the President. They’re discussing the results of the Republican primaries and Josh is on a roll, he’s on fire, nothing can bring him down –

Except CJ walking in with a _look_ on her face, and he says, not too worried, “What’s up?”

“I just got off the phone with Cristina,” she says, slowly. “There’s been a shooting at Georgetown.”

The smile freezes on Josh’s face. Distantly he hears Leo getting on the phone behind him, demanding information, but Josh can’t take his eyes off CJ. “So,” and his voice cracks, and he has to clear his throat before he can try again, “so, did – is, is Anthony…?”

“Maybe we should step into my office,” she says, and great, now Sam and Toby are giving them weird looks.

Josh shakes his head, the distance between the Oval Office and CJ’s suddenly insurmountable. “CJ.”

“Anthony’s in critical condition. They’re doing everything they can.”

“Okay,” he says. His brain is stalled but he’s moving on autopilot, heading for the door before CJ puts a hand on his shoulder to stop him. “What are you doing? I have to go.”

“Josh,” and he can see tears in her eyes, why is she crying, “they won’t let you in to see him.”

Oh.

His knees finally give out at that and he can't _breathe_. Distantly he sees CJ's face in front of his, feels someone's hands - Sam's? - bracing his shoulders, but his vision is getting blurry with tears and all he can think is _Anthony's parents don't know_.

They won't let Josh in, because they don't know, and even if they did it wouldn't matter because they _have no fucking rights to each other_ -

* * *

 The next few minutes are bit fuzzy in Josh's memory, but eventually he finds himself on the couch with his head between his knees and Leo's steady voice telling him to breathe, Josh, breathe.

Because he just had a meltdown in the Oval Office.

_Again_.

"Oh my god," he says. The worry for Anthony is still a tight, horrible knot at the pit of his stomach, but for now he focuses on the fact that he might have just outed himself to the President of the United States. "Oh my god."

"Relax, Josh," comes CJ's voice, and he spares a second to think _thank fuck for lesbians_ before he sits up.

Leo and Sam are on the couch across from him, twin looks of concern on their faces, and CJ's sat next to him, rubbing circles on his back. "Uh. Where's the President? And Toby?"

It's Leo who answers. "The President's taking calls in my office right now. Toby's gone to abuse government power and find out how Anthony's doing."

"Toby guessed it was the Anthony from his synagogue," CJ says, preempting the question. In other words: _I haven't told them_.

They sit in silence for a solid ten minutes, Josh focusing on his breathing, CJ's hand firm on his shoulder. Eventually the door flies open and the president marches in, Toby a step behind him. Everyone's on their feet, Josh included, and Jed's barely seated before he says, "Mr President I am so sorry, I should have -"

"Josh."

"Yes, Mr President?" His voice feels scratchy.

"That wasn't concern for a friend just there."

For a second Josh thinks he's about to start hyperventilating again, but he works past it. "No, Mr President."

Jed nods, and looks over to CJ. "Who is Cristina?"

There's not even the tiniest hesitation in CJ's voice as she answers. "My girlfriend, Mr President."

"And Anthony?"

And, well, if CJ's going to make the jump Josh isn't going to let her fall alone. "My boyfriend, Mr President."

The silence at that stretches out long enough to be uncomfortable, until Leo clears his throat. "Is Zoey alright?"

"She's fine. A bit shaken up, but they're bringing her here." Jed still hasn't looked away from Josh and CJ, but the contemplation in his gaze seems to be directed inwards. "I have to ask, have I ever done anything to suggest that being gay would negatively affect your careers in this White House?"

"Of course not," Josh breathes, as CJ gives a vehement no. "It's not about that."

"The public isn't ready for this," CJ says. "Every single LGBT issue we've ever handled would be called into question."

"No one would think we could be objective."

"You could fire a nuke at London and the press corps would be more interested in the fact that I'm a lesbian."

"It wouldn't be too good for Anthony or Cristina's careers either."

"No, probably not," the president says, but they have to have said something right, because he sits down.

"You still could have told us," Sam says sullenly, but Josh is already turning to Toby.

Toby nods, expression indecipherable. "He's in surgery now, but they think he's going to make it."

Josh has to close his eyes against the overwhelming relief for a moment. “Okay. That’s good.” Now that the initial panic has subsided, everything just feels surreal. Anthony got shot, and Josh just told the president that he’s queer. It’s like a goddamn soap opera.

“Leo,” Jed says.

“Yep?”

“Don’t you think it would look good for the president and some of his senior staffers to visit the victims of a shooting?”

Leo grins, and it’s infectious, like a weight’s lifted from everyone’s shoulders. “Yes, Mr President, I think that would be pretty good.”

**Author's Note:**

> if anyone wants to talk west wing, you can find me on tumblr at all-eyes-on-the-hindenburg


End file.
